Saturday, April 10, 2010


One of my favourite local stores, Pigeonhole, was having a clearance and sample sale this weekend and I picked up ten necklaces, a pair of earrings, a bracelet and these cute owl brooches for only $45! The pom pom necklaces were all tangled and took me about an hour to separate. Obviously, I can't wear all this jewellery myself so some of it may be heading your way.  

Oops, still haven't posted all those giveaway prizes

The post office hours
Coincide with my work hours.
I will try next week.


Advice you probably shouldn't follow

Try to act stupid
Lower their expectations
Fail once in a while

This won't make you a
better person but it will
make life easier

Just joking

What? No new comments?
But I've become addicted
to your daily quips.

Friday, April 9, 2010

On using a typewriter and apartment-dwelling

I wonder if my
typing is pissing off my
neighbours? I hope not.

Olive Someday Giveaway at Post Grad Hair Cut

Don't you love bunting?
You can win some bunting here.
Triangular fun!

I am so unfit

Does roller derby
Require co-ordination
Or could I do it?

I can rollerskate.
All I need is a mouth guard
and knee protection.

I also need an
awesome name so how about
Evil Cerebral?

I could get in shape
for my sister's wedding but
may have a black eye.

Found on the flickr:
The cerebral excrement

Thursday, April 8, 2010

Workplace bullying

It was ladylike.
Regardless, my colleagues all
mocked me for my burp.

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Better fitness through shoddy workmanship

My lift is broken
yet again. I am forced to
use the stairs instead.

This won't mean much if you weren't into the Babysitters Club*

Dawn meets Zach Braff! Giggles.

* I always wished they'd put an apostrophe after the "s". I was such a nerd child.**
**Who's grown into a nerd adult.

Tuesday, April 6, 2010


Eyes won't stay open
Clean sheets, thick pillow slips and
Firm mattress await.

Monday, April 5, 2010

Maybe I should stop going to the cheap nail place

A noxious odour
Has wafted up from my feet
Since my pedicure

How embarrassing. I have been wearing skirts all week.

Having pedicure
Girl at feet asks if I would
like my legs waxed too!

Why quantity will rule over quality, even more than ever

When I started this,
this Cerebral Excrement,
I had a target.

I wanted to write
one haiku per day, at least
one on average.

As I approach one
year of Excrement I am
short of my target.

Hence I must produce
fifty-four little haiku
in the next three weeks.

Please excuse the crap,
the crapper than usual
shitty excrement!

At least with this post
I have conquered six of the
fifty-four haiku!

Easter Bunny Survey

Which do you eat first?
The ears, so bunny can't hear,
Or bunny's bottom?

Sunday, April 4, 2010

Life's small pleasures

Cutting my toenails
Makes my feet feel clean and neat
Like a bald baby